HUMOROUS QUOTES

Have I mentioned that I love quotes? I'm sure I have. Today's quotes are all ones that I find amusing (no game today, as these aren't necessarily from movies).

“Blessed are those who can laugh at themselves, for they will never cease to be amused.” ~Shirley Maclaine

“If you can’t beat them, join them, and if you can’t join them, just annoy the heck out of them!” – John Murphey

"Earth is a powerful element. Properly deployed it will help ground you. If anyone is getting carried away with their own importance, spread soil over the floor of their dorm and their desk. The difference you notice in their behavior will be remarkable." --Wrong Shui

"Sanity is a madness put to good uses." --George Santayana

"Hard work often pays off over time, but laziness always pays off now." ~ Josh Stock

"Distrust any enterprise that requires new clothes." --Henry David Thoreau

“How many times do I have to tell you? Please don’t shoot at the nuclear warheads!” ~ Broken Arrow

"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die." --Mel Brooks

"If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars." --J. Paul Getty

“I’m not laughing at you, I’m laughing with you, you’re just not doing your part.” – Jeremy Schea

"Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so." --Bertrand Russell

"You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there." --Yogi Berra

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." --Albert Einstein

“Do you have any idea how hard it is to think with a rebar through your torso?” ~Angel

And one that isn't humorous, but just lovely, and apt as it is that time of year once again... the time when hope springs new for all Cubs fans... before our hopes and dreams are crushed once more...

“[Baseball] breaks your heart. It is designed to break your heart. The game begins in the spring, when everything else begins again, and it blossoms in the summer, filling the afternoons and evenings, and then as soon as the chill rains come, it stops and leaves you to face the fall all alone. You count on it, rely on it to buffer the passage of time, to keep the memory of sunshine and high skies alive, and then just when the days are all twilight, when you need it most, it stops.” -- A. Bartlett Giamatti

What's your favorite humorous or baseball-related quote?

Don't forget to come on over tomorrow and see the continuation of the SIX DEGREES OF KOOL BOOKS game! DJ started the game last week with his post HERE and I will be choosing a character from a different book that reminds me of one of the characters he mentioned. You can play too! Find out how HERE.